Somatics, Showing Up and Being of Service
In honor of our veterans on Veterans Day, I’ve been reflecting on what it means to be of service—and how we show up for one another in everyday life.
This is Part 3 of my series on Somatics, exploring how greater awareness of our bodies, emotions, and responses can help us connect with others more thoughtfully.
It takes practice to be of service: recalibrating self-awareness to meet others where they would like to be met. It can also take courage to show up for loved ones, co-workers, clients, acquaintances, and strangers with whom we cross paths, whether for a few moments or a few years. Every encounter offers an opportunity to connect and find meaning.
Sometimes, mindful connection happens spontaneously and with ease. Other times, it takes a little more focus to notice and respond to the messages being communicated in the complex environments we share. Either way, we have an opportunity to create a safe space for ourselves and others. That, in itself, is a form of service.
This is Part 3 of my series on Somatics, exploring how greater awareness of our bodies, emotions, and responses can help us connect with others more thoughtfully.
It takes practice to be of service: recalibrating self-awareness to meet others where they would like to be met. It can also take courage to show up for loved ones, co-workers, clients, acquaintances, and strangers with whom we cross paths, whether for a few moments or a few years. Every encounter offers an opportunity to connect and find meaning.
Sometimes, mindful connection happens spontaneously and with ease. Other times, it takes a little more focus to notice and respond to the messages being communicated in the complex environments we share. Either way, we have an opportunity to create a safe space for ourselves and others. That, in itself, is a form of service.
Safety, Fun, and Learning: A Foundation for Connection
“Safety, Fun and Learning” is the first mantra I learned in snow sports education. It serves as a key decision-making tool, helping prioritize interactions on the slopes. Embodying safety opens the door to fun—a fertile space for learning, discovery, and transformation.
It turns out this principle applies to much more than skiing. Think about the many situations we navigate throughout our days, weeks, months, and years. When we feel secure enough to explore, make mistakes, and try something new, possibilities begin to open up.
Safety does not mean risk-free. Rather, it is a visceral experience of feeling secure and unthreatened within one’s soma, allowing us to embrace the moment and explore the unknown. It involves interpreting sensory signals in ways that help us connect with our environment, mind, body, and spirit.
Embodied safety means that emotions, sensations, and movements are valued as interpreters and messengers without being in the driver’s seat. Instead, we learn to regulate the interaction between our internal experience and the world around us.
Calm is one of the most meaningful gifts we can exchange with another person.
Embodied safety is key to exploring and navigating increasingly complex environments.
It turns out this principle applies to much more than skiing. Think about the many situations we navigate throughout our days, weeks, months, and years. When we feel secure enough to explore, make mistakes, and try something new, possibilities begin to open up.
Safety does not mean risk-free. Rather, it is a visceral experience of feeling secure and unthreatened within one’s soma, allowing us to embrace the moment and explore the unknown. It involves interpreting sensory signals in ways that help us connect with our environment, mind, body, and spirit.
Embodied safety means that emotions, sensations, and movements are valued as interpreters and messengers without being in the driver’s seat. Instead, we learn to regulate the interaction between our internal experience and the world around us.
Calm is one of the most meaningful gifts we can exchange with another person.
Embodied safety is key to exploring and navigating increasingly complex environments.
Embodied Safety: Boundaries, Trust, and Calculated Risk
Understanding what safety is—and what it is not—helps us make more thoughtful decisions about risk. It means creating space for people to explore their resilience and comfort with uncertainty. In work, play, and coaching, co-creating experiences and establishing desired outcomes around people’s priorities helps everyone participate more fully.
Our experience of safety naturally ebbs and flows. External factors such as schedules, competing commitments, interruptions, and “the weather” 😉 can influence us, as can internal experiences of fatigue, energy, and focus.
Being of service means making room for people to express their comfort levels and checking in with them along the way. A simple question—“How are you doing with this?”—can open the door to a more supportive learning or working environment.
Feeling safe means it is not only permissible but honorable to say “no” or “not now” and to explore alternative pathways. Boundaries are an essential part of this process, helping us assess risk and make choices that work for everyone involved.
Our experience of safety naturally ebbs and flows. External factors such as schedules, competing commitments, interruptions, and “the weather” 😉 can influence us, as can internal experiences of fatigue, energy, and focus.
Being of service means making room for people to express their comfort levels and checking in with them along the way. A simple question—“How are you doing with this?”—can open the door to a more supportive learning or working environment.
Feeling safe means it is not only permissible but honorable to say “no” or “not now” and to explore alternative pathways. Boundaries are an essential part of this process, helping us assess risk and make choices that work for everyone involved.
Somatic Awareness: Opening the Door to Discovery
A safe space is a portal to discovery. What is the most relevant thing to learn or the next action to take? What might happen if we look at something differently, listen more closely, smell the roses, feel the ground beneath our feet, or simply savor the moment?
Learning to dance from a different position in the studio offers a wonderful example. The studio, instructor, class participants, choreography, music, mirror, and floor all remain the same. Yet, when the dancer changes position, the perspective shifts. Someone new might be dancing nearby, or the spatial relationships within the formation might feel different.
These small changes invite embodied intelligence to recalibrate. Suddenly, the dancer has to reconnect with the steps and the beat of the music—something that felt automatic just moments before.
Sometimes, a fresh perspective is all it takes to discover a new way forward.
Learning to dance from a different position in the studio offers a wonderful example. The studio, instructor, class participants, choreography, music, mirror, and floor all remain the same. Yet, when the dancer changes position, the perspective shifts. Someone new might be dancing nearby, or the spatial relationships within the formation might feel different.
These small changes invite embodied intelligence to recalibrate. Suddenly, the dancer has to reconnect with the steps and the beat of the music—something that felt automatic just moments before.
Sometimes, a fresh perspective is all it takes to discover a new way forward.
Applying Somatic Awareness to Leadership and Relationships
What if we applied that same curiosity to leadership? What sensations arise when you move to a different seat at the roundtable, view a presentation from another angle, invite different assessments, or listen simply to learn rather than to prepare your response?
The same approach works in everyday relationships. Try noticing your own sensations as you check in with a teenager about his life, a friend about a new job, or a partner about how her day went.
What was the best thing that happened today, and why? What was the hardest thing about today, and how did you handle it?
Listen. Get curious. Dig a little deeper.
How did the experience impact you? What texture would you give it—gritty, smooth, liquid, or like stepping on gum on a hot sidewalk?
Then ask: Given that experience, what would you like to do now? Keep going? Try something new? Change directions, increase the intensity, or take a break? Would a hug or a walk help? Or would doing nothing feel just right?
There is no universal answer. The point is to make room for people to discover what they need instead of assuming we already know.
The same approach works in everyday relationships. Try noticing your own sensations as you check in with a teenager about his life, a friend about a new job, or a partner about how her day went.
What was the best thing that happened today, and why? What was the hardest thing about today, and how did you handle it?
Listen. Get curious. Dig a little deeper.
How did the experience impact you? What texture would you give it—gritty, smooth, liquid, or like stepping on gum on a hot sidewalk?
Then ask: Given that experience, what would you like to do now? Keep going? Try something new? Change directions, increase the intensity, or take a break? Would a hug or a walk help? Or would doing nothing feel just right?
There is no universal answer. The point is to make room for people to discover what they need instead of assuming we already know.
Showing Up Is a Practice of Being of Service
Showing up, especially when multiple situations vie for our attention, takes practice. Somatic awareness—paying attention to what our bodies are communicating—helps us become more aware of ourselves and more responsive to the people around us.
We don’t have to get it perfect. We can pause, notice, listen, and try again.
In honor of our veterans on Veterans Day, this is a reminder that service takes many forms. Sometimes it means stepping forward. Sometimes it means making space for someone else. And sometimes, it starts with being present enough to recognize what another person needs.
We don’t have to get it perfect. We can pause, notice, listen, and try again.
In honor of our veterans on Veterans Day, this is a reminder that service takes many forms. Sometimes it means stepping forward. Sometimes it means making space for someone else. And sometimes, it starts with being present enough to recognize what another person needs.
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